The Benefits of (and Tips for) Scheduling Self-Care
By Ashley Miers
Self care doesn't just "happen". Like anything in life, if you want to see substantial rewards for your efforts, it's essential to be intentional.
And to be intentional about self care, I can’t recommend highly enough actually planning it and building it into your calendar.
My self care routine is always a work in progress. Especially over the past few years with my first pregnancy and first couple of years of motherhood, my routine was always evolving. It seemed like every couple of months required me to make adjustments - to my sleep, to my workouts, to my meditation, even to my hygiene (gone were the days of impromptu - or even every day - showers).
This experience was such an incredible lesson in surrendering control, in asking for and accepting support, in embracing adaptability. We recently moved, and with our fresh new space, I also wanted to be intentional about creating a fresh new start and establishing healthy habits right away. The image included with this post above is an example of a daily "schedule" I created for myself and am currently implementing in my life.
As you can see, you don’t have to get super comprehensive about planning your self care routine. Even just sketching out a framework on paper (as per my example) is an excellent start. That being said, you can be as comprehensive as you want, but if overwhelm due to the pressure of that is going to lead to procrastination and get in the way of you taking action… Let perfectionism go! “Done is better than perfect” and “It doesn’t matter where you start - as long as you start”!
If you're new to this kind of thing, I always advise my coaching clients to start small. Schedule in 5 minutes of mediation each morning, or walk 30 minutes 3 times per week. And when I say schedule your self care in… I truly mean SCHEDULE it. Put it in your calendar or your planner just like you would any other appointment. Get consistent with one change, and then build from there. Trying to change every aspect of our lives at once is incredibly overwhelming, so start small, celebrate you successes and build as you go.
Keep in mind that I've been building my routine for years. You don't have to revolutionize your life overnight.
The most important thing is to be kind to yourself. Self care is about improving our health and our habits not because we are "not good enough", but because we love ourselves and want to feel and perform at our best. Don't lose sight of that!
Also keep in mind that none of this is rigid or set in stone. If something needs to shift, shift it. There's an art to balancing commitment with playfulness and spontaneity.
I consider my example schedule a “template”. If I need to schedule a doctor’s appointment for instance, I rework my plan for that day to be sure my self-care still gets included. Maybe that means working in the evening a night or two that week, for instance.
One important point I want to emphasize is that my self-care routine creates structure for me, and structure can be a truly wonderful thing. It gives us a sense of order and organization when we know what to expect (which results in less stress and more peace of mind).
Structure and planning actually create more freedom in our lives because we can build in relaxation and imperative down time while also ensuring our responsibilities are fulfilled. And when our responsibilities are fulfilled, we're not scrambling to put out fires or do damage control all of the time (because we know what we can realistically accomplish and what we truly have time for), which leads to a sense of calm and confidence overall.
It can be exhausting to constantly be "making it up as we go" (not to mention inefficient). Human beings thrive on routine. Our bodies were built for it - just think of our sleep cycles based that are based on circadian rhythms. Our sleep-wake cycles rise with the sun and set with the moon.
One thing you won't see in the example of my daily self care schedule that - but that I also do - is aspects of my schedule that are routinized on a weekly or monthly basis (meal planning/grocery shopping, working on finances, etc).
And one thing you will see is that I've gotten pretty passionate about my skin care routine lately. It feels like such a lovely and nurturing indulgence to pamper my face each evening before crawling into bed. It's the coziest feeling and I honestly wake up so much more refreshed and positive the next morning when I know I have tucked myself into bed with loving kindness the night before. You can read more about my thoughts on (and the benefits of) a skin care routine here.
Do you schedule in self care? If not, reach out. I’d be happy to help you get the hang of it. :)
As Tony Robbins says: "Your rituals equal your results". What are your most beloved and impactful self care rituals? I’d love to hear!